To Be Loved

Broken hearted
You should be ashamed.
Pictures on my wall
Are thrown away.
No words left
Nothing left to say.
You were gone
Why are you back today?

And I tried to fight back
All the words needed to attack
Think you didn't deserve that
But what have I been thrown at?

*chorus*
And you might think I'm crazy
Full of twisted fantasies
But I'll never know what it feels like
To live life normally
To have something with simplicity
I can only imagine what it feels like
To be loved.

To be loved.

When you were gone
You didn't have a care.
Memories disappeared
in thin air.
You just put us all
In despair.
All I asked the world is
"is this fair?"


And I tried to fight back
All the words needed to attack
Think you didn't deserve that
But what have I been thrown at?

*chorus*
And you might think I'm crazy
Full of twisted fantasies
But I'll never know what it feels like
To live life normally
To have something with simplicity
I can only imagine what it feels like
To be loved.

You're not a hero
So stop trying to patch the hole
I don't need your saving
I'm fine with being alone
You left me years ago
You didn't even care
All I did was imagine
What it's like if you were here.


*chorus*
And you might think I'm crazy
Full of twisted fantasies
But I'll never know what it feels like
To live life normally
To have something with simplicity
I can only imagine what it feels like
To be loved.



^ That amazeballs moment when I wrote a song after what seems like forever :)

I'd Stop (full song!)

I'm getting worked up, tired,
I'm frustrated.
I can't keep my mind straight.


Ignorance has blinded you,
You just walk away,
I'm losing the connection,


*Chorus*
I'd stop the whole world,
I'd stop those just like you.
I'd make you stop and watch,
Make you remember and regret.
I'd stop myself from falling,
I'd make you search for me.
But I'll never be found.
Cause I'm gone.

Life is a journey,
I've been lead to you.
What have I got caught up in?

My mind's going crazy, insane,
You left me alone,
I should have known.


*Chorus*
I'd stop the whole world,
I'd stop those just like you.
I'd make you stop and watch,
Make you remember and regret.
I'd stop myself from falling,
I'd make you search for me.
But I'll never be found.
Cause I'm gone.

*Bridge

Everything turned into pieces,
Your promises turned into lies.
It wasn't what I expected.
All you did was change your mind.



It's hard to keep trust when there
Was nothing to start with.
Years have come and gone,
And I'm sick and tired of your negative words

*Chorus*
I'd stop the whole world,
I'd stop those just like you.
I'd make you stop and watch,
Make you remember and regret.
I'd stop myself from falling,
I'd make you search for me.
But I'll never be found.
Cause I'm gone.

Goodbye

Take care of yourself,
I promise we will get far,
Tomorrow's looking promising,
Even though we're all apart.

It's not a complete goodbye,
But we have to drift away,
I guess we have no other choice,
But have one thing to say...

*Chorus*
Goodbye, to the memories,
To the journey,
To the laughs we had.
Hello, to the open doors,
Wait for what's in store,
New moments to add.
But all I want to say,
And remember today,
And what we had.
Goodbye, and hello

Take care of yourself,
It's not the complete end of us.
We're all had our share of moments,
Happier ones and rough.

It'll take some time of getting used to,
But we'll be fine.
I guess we have no other choice,
But to say goodbye


*Chorus*
Goodbye, to the memories,
To the journey,
To the laughs we had.
Hello, to the open doors,
Wait for what's in store,
New moments to add.
But all I want to say,
And remember today,
And what we had.
Goodbye, and hello

Tomorrow's looking promising.
We've gotten through everything.
It's not the end of us.


*Chorus*
Goodbye, to the memories,
To the journeys,
To the laughs we had.
Hello, to the open doors,
Wait for what's in store,

But all I want to say,
Is goodbye.

Insincerity

Way to be optimistic, Mani.
Well, here goes nothing.


Insincerity 


Here you are right in front of me,
My heart is stabbed by memories.
Broken promises between you and me.
All cause of your insincerity. 

I'm falling from the force,
It keeps bringing me down.
I can't seem to find my soul.
It's nowhere to be found.

But I'm not going anywhere,
You have no right to push me.
All this time I've been in pain,
Get me out of this misery.

*chorus*
Here you are right in front of me,
My heart is stabbed by memories.
Broken promises between you and me.
All cause of your insincerity.

Being unaccepted for who I am.
It's hard to change me,
I don't want to please you,
I can't please everybody.

I'm slowly walking away,
Don't chase after me.
I've been in pain,
Get me out of this misery

*chorus*
Here you are right in front of me,
My heart is stabbed by memories.
Broken promises between you and me.
All cause of your insincerity.

Here you are right in front of me,
My heart is stabbed by memories.
Broken promises between you and me.
All cause of your insincerity.

 I can't please everybody.


Yeah. There you have it.

Why

If it weren't for you,
I wouldn't have written this song,
I wouldn't have been in despair,
No one needed to catch me.

I thought I had place to call my own,
But instead I was manipulated.
I never thought I'd be so vulnerable,
But look at what you've shown.

*chorus*
Why did I crumble myself?
Why did you throw me away?
Why did you pick me up,
And placed me someplace safe?

But now if it weren't for you,
I'd be at the bottom of the hole,
I'd be climbing the walls,
Trying to get up.

And I thought I had no hope
But I found myself an angel.
I've been granted a wish,
I never thought I'd ever wish for.

*chorus*

Why did I crumble myself?
Why did you throw me away?
Why did you pick me up,
And placed me someplace safe?

Why did I break apart?
Why did you kick me aside?
Why did you pick me up,
When I was about to run and hide?

Why did you hold me close,
When they picked a fight?

Currently untitled sad, "pick me up" song

You'll make your way,
You'll find a path to get out,
You've held it for so long,
Without a scream or a shout.

It's hard to let go,
Everything is out of control,
Know that I'll be there,
There's so much to know.

Remember the love, it'll make you stronger.
You can spread your wings, you can fly,
Remember you'll be watched over...

So just close your eyes,
You're in for a roller coaster ride.
Every day will have another sunrise.
Even if every chapter ends sad,
Remember that the story hasn't finished.
So keep your head high, your chin up,
Look at the stars to see.


And every step you make,
Will be the start of an adventure,
So open up a new chapter,
And hold on to those memories.

Remember the love, the memories are there,
The world's spinning fast, but even through despair,
Remember you can find a way out.

So just close your eyes,
You're in for a roller coaster ride.
Every day will have another sunrise.
Even if every chapter ends sad,
Remember that the story hasn't finished.
So keep your head high, your chin up,
Look at the stars to see.

Words like goodbye,
Seems so hard to spit out,
And you don't know when you can say hello again.
But listen,
There's too much to say in this world.
So remember, keep the love in your heart.

So just close your eyes,
You're in for a roller coaster ride.
Every day will have another sunrise.
Even if every chapter ends sad,
Remember that the story hasn't finished.
So keep your head high, your chin up,
Look at the stars to see.


^ YAY! ANOTHER NEW SONG THAT I WROTE ABOUT A WEEK AGO BUT FAILED TO POST UNTIL NOW. :D

Leaving.

Leaving

There's a voice inside my head,
Telling me to get you out of my life.
Hesitation takes over me.

Splitting thoughts,
Can't believe what you did.
After many years of misery.

I could've seen it.
I knew it's coming.
Didn't know it would be now.
Your selfish hands,
Got closer to me.
Is it my fault or yours?

*chorus*
You know what you've done,
Now, those days are gone.
You pushed me out and I'm not coming back in.
You made life into a game,
I didn't fall into the traps you made.
And now I'm leaving, leaving, leaving, leaving.

Angry words fill your mouth,
I'm trying to defend love.
Am I doing something wrong?

My mind is racing thoughts.
Will they ever be heard?
I always knew all along...

I could've seen it.
I knew it's coming.
Didn't know it would be now.
You've pushed me away,
We can't go back.
Nothing can change now.

*chorus*
You know what you've done,
Now, those days are gone.
You pushed me out and I'm not coming back in.
You made life into a game,
I didn't fall into the traps you made.
And now I'm leaving, leaving, leaving, leaving.

Words left unsaid.
Though remain in my head.
Will you hear them at all?

Your cold hearts will break,
Inside there's too much hate.
Nothing can change now.

Because,
You don't know the pain I've been through.
You tried to understand but it's no use.
Stop being double faced, it's not working.
It's all fake and now I'm leaving.

*chorus*
You know what you've done,
Now, those days are gone.
You pushed me out and I'm not coming back in.
You made life into a game,
I didn't fall into the traps you made.
And now I'm leaving, leaving, leaving, leaving.

You don't know what I've been through,
You never believe in the truth.
I've given up, I tried listening.
You've broken the bond and now I'm leaving.


It's been a tough week for me. I know, bad timing. Holidays- it's supposed to be happy!
Gee, how happy is this song?
It's been a while since I posted a full song anyway... 
I kind of needed to vent out somehow.
Thanks for reading!

Let's hope Christmas turns upside down and I'll have a cheerful song.

Tied to a Mess

I'm staring up at the stars,
Wondering where you are ,
If you can see where I'm at.

I make a wish every night,
Hoping that there wont be any fights.
Hope isn't strong enough.

And what could I say to make my life change?
What can I do to make wishes come true?

*chorus*
I want a little more help, I just need a wish,
I need something to get lost in.
If only there's a way to get by,
To get out of the mess we're tied too.
I want a little more peace, I just need hope,
I just need a place to call my own,
If only there's a way to get by,
To get out of the mess we're tied too.

I'm found on my own,
Not knowing where to go.
As if you just left me here.

People tear apart,
My heart's being ripped apart.
How can I make it stop.

And what can I see to make you believe in me?
What can I try to get some more time?

*chorus*
I want a little more help, I just need a wish,
I need something to get lost in.
If only there's a way to get by,
To get out of the mess we're tied too.
I want a little more peace, I just need hope,
I just need a place to call my own,
If only there's a way to get by,
To get out of the mess we're tied too.

Can it all wash away?
All the pain I endure each day.
Can it all end?
I want to start over again.

*chorus*
I want a little more help, I just need a wish,
I need something to get lost in.
If only there's a way to get by,
To get out of the mess we're tied too.
I want a little more peace, I just need hope,
I just need a place to call my own,
If only there's a way to get by,
To get out of the mess we're tied too.


^Okay. I think it's time for a story. Y'all know how I got this idea? From the song  "Tongue Tied" by Faber Drive. (click on it to hear the song!)

Actually, from reading the lyrics, it seems like the same tune. No. It's actually not. It's quite different. When I say that a song is inspiring and makes me write another one, I mean the lyrics or the theme. Sometimes it's the tune, but I would usually say that if I did mean it.

 So yeah, back to my sad songs, I suppose.

My Inner Poet. Part 3.

You.
Who are you?
What have you done with my life?
So many decisions have been made,
My life has been turned upside down.
I've sacrificed so much.
Do you even care?

What.
What are you trying to do?
Run away from here,
I can't take it anymore.
Why should you be trusted?
I can't even open my heart out.
Everyone else can,
Except for me.

Go.
I don't care.
I never got what I deserved,
Why should you get it back now?
I've tried to hard to please you,
Prove myself and cared.
Did I get anything back?
I'm engulfed in my misery.

Cry.
It's all I ever do nowadays.
My dreams have turned into nightmares.
Sleepless nights.
I've turned into an insomniac.
You portray an enemy;
Someone who pushes me down.
And I'm falling.

Welcome to my upside-down life.
Will you ever bother fixing it so it's right side up?

Okay, I know I've been obsessed with poetry. Haha. This is actually a poem based on a mixture of events that have happened in my life. I know, depressing but a good portion of it is exaggerated. (phew, haha.)

Happy Reading!

Demi Lovato Is My Hero. As Of Right Now.

Skyscraper. Demi Lovato. Enough said. Check it out:

I just heard this song and I started to bawl my eyes out. Is that normal? heh.

IT'S JUST THAT THIS SONG IS SO AMAZING AND INSPIRING. 

Let's just say, when I hear a song like that, I get inspired and then I come up with an uber depressing song too.
Honestly speaking, sometimes I do feel this way.

Anyway, here it goes: Shattered Glass

I'm surrounded by the walls,
That are pushing me inside.
No one hears me, no one cares,
About my screams and cries.

I'm still wishing and hoping,
That maybe I'll have a chance.
But my moment seems like it's
Slipping right out of my hands.

*chorus*
What do you feel when I'm in pain?
You seem to think I'm going insane.
But you don't realize.
You don't know what I'm going through.
The truth is what you're seeing through.
But I won't break.
I won't break like shattered glass.

I watch the raindrops fall and shatter,
Breaking like pieces, separating apart.
Your torments, your laughter,
Is hitting me inside like darts.

I want to see the skies clear,
And know that it's alright.
I'm going crazy but I'm standing tall,
Just to show you that I'm fine.

*chorus*
What do you feel when I'm in pain?
You seem to think I'm going insane.
But you don't realize.
You don't know what I'm going through.
The truth is what you're seeing through.
But I won't break.
I won't break like shattered glass.

Go close the door and run away.
I can't take it anymore.
Why do you make me feel so worthless,
It's making me heart sore.


*chorus*
What do you feel when I'm in pain?
You seem to think I'm going insane.
But you don't realize.
You don't know what I'm going through.
The truth is what you're seeing through.
But I won't break.
I won't break like shattered glass.

The truth is what you're seeing through.

I wont break like shattered glass.


^ Okay, so yeah. That's it!!
I know it's really sad but I hope y'all like it.
I should really start writing more cheerful songs. :D

Survivor

NEW SONG! NEW SONG! :)

Sticks and stones don't break me,
But your words do.
I'm trying to get out of this mess,
All I want is the truth.

I'm stuck in between my problems,
I wish it would just go away.
Why oh why is it just me
Suffering from the pain?

*chorus*
*Do you know that I'm a survivor?
I'll keep soaring higher and higher.
Don't underestimate me, I'm a fighter.
Your words wont bring me down, anymore.

I'm trying my hardest to blend in,
But I still stand out.
I'm stuck in many situations,
I want to scream and shout.

In a world where peace is lacking,
It gets worse and worse.
Everyone's now in trouble.
Can someone help make it worse.

*chorus*

*Do you know that I'm a survivor?
I'll keep soaring higher and higher.
Don't underestimate me, I'm a fighter.
Your words wont bring me down, anymore.


*Do you know that I'm a survivor?
I'll keep soaring higher and higher.
Don't underestimate me, I'm a fighter.
Your words wont bring me down, anymore.

 
<3 

Spazzing At My Camera. Part 1

Oh gosh, why does my voice sound like... erm... poop in a camera?

HOW ON EARTH DO PEOPLE MAKE THEIR VOICES SOUND GOOD IN A CAMERA.

HOW?
HOW?
HOW?

The frustration is killing me. I'm discombobulated, like, legitly. discombobulated.

Is 'legitly' even a word? I don't care. I shall make it one.

Time for me to rage. Here we go.
Three.
Two.
One.

qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm. reujklgsjaiorehjklgawrpiegruohjksdadiouregjksgjhsp;dfljkd.
-slams head on keyboard-

Ouch.

Any-who, that's not the worst part. Every time I make an attempt to post a video on here, blogger will gladly ruin my moment and I will have a pop-up saying  "We are sorry, but there was an error while uploading your video.

WHAT IS THIS INSANITY?

Does blogger not like uploading new high definition videos? I think not.

Ragequit.

Now, I shall eat sweet oranges and grapes while crying in misery.

Shattered.

I stare at an empty page,
Waiting for a miracle.
Wondering if something magical will happen soon.

The tears I'm fighting back,
I wish for something great.
But I guess, not every wish will come true.

Maybe I thought I had a chance,
Maybe I thought you changed.
If only you knew what was on my mind,
What I'm thinking these days.

*chorus*
So why did I get lost,
When maybe I could've gotten out?
Why did I try hard,
When maybe I'm falling down?
Why did I dream,
When I know they will be shattered...?

I walk on an empty road,
Walking on a fragile line.
I wonder when the moment comes, when it breaks.

I stood there watching you out.
I'm just holding my breath.
Everyone's helping me out to cease the pain.

Maybe I thought I had a chance,
Maybe I thought you changed.
If only you knew what was on my mind,
What I'm thinking these days.

*chorus*
So why did I get lost,
When maybe I could've gotten out?
Why did I try hard,
When maybe I'm falling down?
Why did I dream,
When I know they will be shattered?

Why did I wish,
When I know they wont come true?
Why did I listen,
When you weren't listening to me?
Why did I dream,
When I know they will be shattered?

So why did I get lost,
When maybe I could've gotten out?
Why did I try hard,
When maybe I'm falling down?
Why did I dream,
When I know they will be shattered?


Yay! Finished! I know, sad, depressing. :(
But I still hope y'all like it tho.

FEEDBACK IS ALWAYS WELCOMEEEEEE. :D

Midnight Writing. My Brain is in Action

I stare at an empty page,
Waiting for a miracle.
Wondering if something magical will happen soon.

The tears I'm fighting back,
I wish for something great.
But I guess, not every wish will come true.

Maybe I thought I had a chance,
Maybe I thought you changed.
If only you knew what was on my mind,
What I'm thinking these days.

*chorus*
So why did I get lost,
When maybe I could've gotten out?
Why did I try hard,
When maybe I'm falling down?
Why did I dream,
When I know they will be shattered...?



I'l try to finish it soon! Oh gosh, I just hate it when I can't finish a song but I can't help it. :S

Time to say goodbye to school.

School's ending in about 3 days.
YAY or NAY?

Nay for me. Kind of. I don't want to say goodbye to this year. It's been amazing.
But at least I'll see my friends next year.

So, doing what (my friends say) I do best... IMMA WRITE A NEW SONG. BOO YA.

Here it goes.

It seems as if each moment,
Slips away from our hand.
It's like in the hourglass,
The sand falls too fast.

I don't want these memories,
To go, run and hide.
It seems like once it's over,
It means.... goodbye.

Before we know it, it's all gone.
We were waiting for summer, but now we're wrong.
As we get closer, to the year's end.
We wish we can go back, and start all over again.


*chorus*
Can you believe it?
Wasn't it just yesterday, when it all just started?
Can you see it?
See out future growing, all of us together.
And even though we'll meet again,
No one will want this to end,
'Cause, it seems like it will go away forever.

I'll try to cherish,
Each memory we shared.
Spark the light,
Make it light up in the air.

We'll stick together,
We hope to grow strong.
And we will make it through,
As the days go on.

Before we know it, it's all gone,
We were waiting for summer, now we're all wrong.
As we get closer,forever seems lost,
I hope we can go back, to the paths we crossed.

*chorus*
Can you believe it?
Wasn't it just yesterday, when it all just started?
Can you see it?
See out future growing, all of us together.
And even though we'll meet again,
No one will want this to end,
'Cause, it seems like it will go away forever.

As we get closer, to the year's end.
We wish we can go back, and start all over again....

Can you believe it?

*chorus*
Can you believe it?
Wasn't it just yesterday, when it all just started?
Can you see it?
See out future growing, all of us together.
And even though we'll meet again,
No one will want this to end,
'Cause, it seems like it will go away forever.



Yes, cheesy song right there. I kind of want to cry. *sniff*

Sad Song. How Wonderful

I wrote another half song. It's quite sad.
I have no story to tell you today, other than that I'm excited that I have a 4-day weekend! Awesome sauce.

Here goes the song.

I'm trying to get out,
Of the mess I made.
I hope I can find out,
I can find out a way.

I'm lost in the dark,
Silence screams loud.
There's no one to save me,
Catch me from falling down.

I know I'm stuck, I've been left alone,
To solve my problems on my own.
I need to figure out how to fix this,
Without broken promises.

But I need someone to tell me,
Am I crazy?
Am I lost in my mind?
I need someone to believe me,
And even see,
That maybe I'm alright.
I've got to find a way,
To get out the mess,
And I hope that,
Maybe it'll get fixed.
So just tell me, tell me, just tell me.